My meditation today: 12 am (40 minutes)
I am out of sync today. My happiness project does not get anywhere. I feel miserable and my stomach hurts. My meditation turned into a crying fit. I feel such immense sadness that it is drowning me.
I am so disappointed. I thought I was doing so much better and seems like I am going backwards.
I have been listening 2 hours of Deepak Chopra´s lecturers in Synchrodestiny. The idea that nothing is a coincidence but a part of the great orchestration of the Universe is fascinating. And yet - I just feel emptiness. I experience no synchronities. I am starting to wonder if I am spiritually damaged. How can anyone be so out of tune after so much effort.
Maybe I am doing too much. I really don´t know. I try to be easy with myself. I sleep a lot and rest. I am alone. I exercise gratitude. I try to love myself.
And yet I am miserable.
I release it all resistance now. I accept the emptiness. I let go of my desires. I give up.
I am out of sync today. My happiness project does not get anywhere. I feel miserable and my stomach hurts. My meditation turned into a crying fit. I feel such immense sadness that it is drowning me.
I am so disappointed. I thought I was doing so much better and seems like I am going backwards.
I have been listening 2 hours of Deepak Chopra´s lecturers in Synchrodestiny. The idea that nothing is a coincidence but a part of the great orchestration of the Universe is fascinating. And yet - I just feel emptiness. I experience no synchronities. I am starting to wonder if I am spiritually damaged. How can anyone be so out of tune after so much effort.
Maybe I am doing too much. I really don´t know. I try to be easy with myself. I sleep a lot and rest. I am alone. I exercise gratitude. I try to love myself.
And yet I am miserable.
I release it all resistance now. I accept the emptiness. I let go of my desires. I give up.
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