My meditation yesterday: 2 pm (40 minutes)
Today 9 am (15 minutes in metro), 10 pm (45 minutes guided Ho'oponopono mantra meditation on Theta Binaural Beats)

Yesterday started good and ended bad. I chose to get provoked by my ex and lost it. I had a melt down and made a fool of myself. What worries me is not that I lost my face because I think that is good. It means my Ego is on its way to destruction which is something I cannot wait. What worries me is that I still have meltdowns and don´t seem to be able to control my emotions.

Or am I out of whack because of the purification process?

I opened my junk mail and saw this message from God today:

On this day of your life, kati, I believe God wants you to know...     ...that your heart will be opened again soon. Indeed, very soon, if you are receptive to it. Do not think that you have had your last chance to love. God would never do that to you. Your chances are as endless as life itself! So love, love, love. And do not worry about who loves you back. Then get set for more love to fill your days and nights, precisely because you have not worried about it. For you always receive from the world what you give to the world. It is The Law. You know exactly why you are reading this message right now.

I am thinking that this is exactly what I have been doing. I have tried to love my husband but the problem is that I cannot deal with him not loving me back. I try to refocus on love. I try to just love. I spread love to everyone, everywhere. I stop worrying. I release the worries.

I thought I have done that already but the truth is that I am not yet where I want to be. My dreams reveal the truth. I am out of sync, still.

You always receive from the world what you give to the world. 

If I want love, I must give love.